[Newsletters | September 2021] – What If You Are Invited To The Wedding Party Of A Vietnamese Or American Family?

Things to know if you are invited to a Vietnamese wedding party

1. Guests confirmed to attend the wedding but they may not come

For relatives or close friends, when they cannot attend the wedding, the guests will express their regrets and apologize to the bride and the groom so that the couple can adjust the reception. However, with normal friends, in order not to make the bride and the groom feel sad, they may not refuse directly, but still accept and then not attend. The couple will be able to confirm this through other guests, or through their perception of their relationship with this guest. However, it is more helpful to correctly confirm your participation so that the couple can prepare the wedding party proactively and thoughtfully.

2. Guests should not dress too simple or too prominent

If you dress simply, or casually, people will see that you do not respect the wedding. And if you dress too prominently, taking attention away from the bride and the groom – the main characters of the party, that is also highly unappreciated. Ideally, you should dress elegantly, but appropriate to the situation. You can ask the couple about the “uniform” for the party, for example: color, style, etc… so that you don’t feel alone in the middle of the party.

3. Preparing a wedding envelope

Unlike many Western countries, in Vietnamese weddings, guests will congratulate the bride and the groom with an envelope with cash inside. This wedding gift represents the blessing to the couple and gives them some capital to start their new life together. On the cover of the envelope, you should clearly state your name and additional information so that the bride and the groom can recognize you. The amount depends on many factors: the level of closeness between the guests and the couple, the guest’s financial ability, or simply a “repayment” of the amount of money they last offered you at your wedding. In many places, in addition to family members, close friends or relatives will offer the couple gold items because gold does not lose value over time and conveys a special meaning: wishing the couple a long and stable marriage. If you don’t know how much to offer or whether to give money or gold, you can learn about the local custom, or consult your wedding group or other experienced people for advice.

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4. Greeting the elders at the wedding party

In a traditional wedding, the party will be held for 2 days, but usually guests who are friends and colleagues will only be invited to the party on the day of the main wedding ceremony. At that time, there will be many relatives, friends and family members including grandparents, parents of the bride and the groom. If you meet them, politely say hello and introduce yourself as the family members of the bride and the groom are also delighted to learn about their children’s relationships.

 

When entering the party, if you do not go in a group, you may be arranged with people you do not know, and often times someone may be older than you. You should politely greet everyone and pay attention to the etiquette at the table while offering special respect to older guests.

 

5. Saying goodbye to the bride and the groom and/or their parents before leaving

Even though the wedding is packed with people, you are advised to say goodbye to the bride and the groom and/or their parents before you leave. It’s polite to announce your departure, so they won’t be confused when they suddenly don’t see you at the party anymore. Besides, they also will have the opportunity to thank you for your presence on the most important day of their lives. Don’t forget to congratulate the couple on their day!

Noble Network hopes this article will bring you a lot of useful information about Vietnamese culture, especially on important occasions such as wedding or other intimate events.

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